if you think hiring people with the best qualifications is racist, and hiring someone because they are not ‘white’ is fairness, you might be a liberal.
If you think you are qualified to speak out on political issues because you once played a politician on tv, you might be a liberal.
If you fly around the country in a huge luxury jet telling everyone about the plight of the ‘poor’ and the woes of pollution, you might be a liberal.
If your definition of ‘character’ is one of the guys in your favorite skit on Saturday Night Live…. you might be a liberal.
If you think a joke about a curly hair on a coke can is sexual harassment, but getting blown by a 19 year old intern is nobody’s business…. you might be a liberal.
If you can’t see the similarities between ‘Green’ and ‘Red’… you might be a liberal.
If you think someone that busts their ass for 30 years building a business that started in a garage with three people into one of the largest enterprises in the world is evil, and someone that keeps getting knocked up so she can still get beer, cigarettes and lottery tickets with the money left over from her government WIC payments is good…. you might be a liberal!
If you think the second amendment is outdated because it was written during a time of muskets and black powder not machine guns and rocket launchers, but overlook the fact the first amendment was written when they had hand-operated printing presses, not world wide satellite television and internet…. you might be a liberal!
If you’ve ever caught your 15 y.o. kid having sex and stopped to give them pointers before leaving the room… you might be a liberal.
If you’ve ever shared a joint with your teenage son, you might be a liberal.
If you think anyone working on a lumberjack crew or an oil rig should find a new career, but a teenager working summers flipping burgers at mcdonalds deserves a significant pay raise courtesy of the federal minimum wage, you may be a liberal.
If you think serving in the national guard to avoid the draft is a crime against America, but driving off of a bridge drunk leaving a woman to die and not reporting it until the next morning after you’ve talked to your attorney is completely excusable, you might be a liberal.
If your two greatest political heroes are the grandson of an Opium dealer (FDR) and the son of a boot legger (JFK), you might be a liberal.
If you’ve ever tried to convince someone ‘eating meat is bad’ by offering them a ‘turkey flavored’ hunk of tofu or a ‘beef flavored’ patty of fungus, you might be a liberal.
one inspired by: http://www.comedy-zone.net/jokes/laugh/politics/pol010.htm
If you think Al Franken, Bill Maher and Jon Stewart are funny, and you actually believe Michael Moore when he says “I haven’t benefited from capitalism”…. you might be a liberal.
One borrowed from: http://www.theliberalforums.com/you-might-be-a-democrat-if-vt42.html
if your kitchen pantry smells like the local landfill because of your avid commitment to ‘recycling’, you might be a liberal.
A couple from Robert Harrison:
If you think that the only reason socialism hasn’t worked is because the wrong people have been in charge, ‘you might be a liberal’.”
If you think that the Arts never exiisted before federal funding, you might be a liberal.