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Posts Tagged ‘dream’

Last night I had a dream. I was sitting in a park minding my own business when up walked none other than President Barack Obama. Before I could say anything, he began to speak.

“I understand you don’t like me young man,” he said reaching out his hand.

I just sat nonplussed and responded, “To be more accurate I disapprove of you.”

Seeing I was not going to shake his hand, he held it out a moment longer than eventually pulled it back with a slight ‘hmm’ sound then resumed speaking with his political smile.

“Well, I would like to try to change your mind. As President of these United States I would like to offer you anything you desire that is within my power to grant.”

I looked up at him a second to see if he was serious, then looked around to see if perhaps it was some kind of hidden camera prank, then looked back at the President. He seemed quite in earnest. After I pondered his intentions a bit longer, he finally asked again, “Well, what would it be?”

I took in a deep breath and said simply, “No.”

“No?” he asked, “You mean to say I offer you anything you want, anything that is within my power to grant you and your answer is no?”

“Yes,” I said, “my answer is no. But if you are sincere in your desire for me to have such a favor, I will tell you what…,” and I reached into my pocket and pulled out a pen and a small pad of paper I carry around for scribbling down writing ideas.

As I started to write, the President tried to peek out of curiousity, but catching my attention and causing me to pause in my writing, he quickly resumed his smiling stance patient but curious to see what I was up to.  I eventually finished writing and tore off the sheet and handed it to the him. It read as follows:

To whom it may concern:

Today I offered a young man by the name of Scott Webster Wood a favor of anything I had within the power of my office to bestow upon him for the purpose of trying to gain his favorable regard of me and my administration. This young man refused my offer.

He refused it on the grounds that he does not approve of my administration, it’s policies or even my holding this office based on the nature of those policies. Therefore he considered me neither worthy, nor holding the appropriate authority to grant such a privilege onto him in the first place.

But it was my sincere intention to grant this favor. So should this man ever return to the capital seeking fulfillment of this favor, I would like to ask humbly that you take it under consideration should any of my successors be found sufficiently worthy by this young gentleman after my term of office has expired.

Sincerely,

X______________________________
President Barack Hussein Obama

When it appeared he had finished reading, I told him, “Now all you need do, if your offer was in fact sincere, is sign your name down there at the bottom and shove that somewhere in the drawer of that big HMS desk that you love to put your feet up on all the time.”

Obama just scoffed, then began to laugh, crumpling up the piece of paper and throwing it on the ground before walking away spouting only the word “Fool!” I went back to minding my own business.

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Originally posted to Facebook Notes

I had a surreal dream.

It started by witnessing an altruist explaining to his followers why it should be important to ‘them’ to do things for others.
I then saw a marxist trying to convince a crowd that his ideas were better than anyone elses.
Off to the side there was a Democrat, at first I thought he simply had many faces but then I saw he actually had many ‘selves’. While one was distracting a voter telling him how much he cared for the ‘little guy’ like him, another was behind the man picking his pocket and yet another was around a corner counting the days loot and stuffing it in his own pockets.
Just past him down the ally there was a Republican. At first I thought he also had many selves but apparently the other was just his twin. The first was trying to figure out how to turn a donkey into an elephant (or perhaps it was turn an elephant into a donkey but that’s neither here nor there – all I saw was an ass that never forgets). The second was talking to a group of assembled businessmen for a rather large fee trying to explain to them how he would help them to keep more of the money they earn.
Somewhere in the background the entire time was the constant jabbering of a utilitarian describing how people who did nothing of real value were worthless.
Among the crowd there was an environmentalist handing out a huge stack of paper fliers that read ‘save the trees’!
I then spied a nihilist, he was waiting for a reason to act on something – I don’t even think he was sure what or why he would do it.
Right smack in the middle there was a feminist wearing blue jeans and a muscle shirt, with her hair cut short making very aggressive gestures while barking out loud denunciations about the patriarchal (male dominated) nature of society.
Off in another corner was a chaos theorist who was quite perplexed flipping a double headed coin that always seemed to come up heads.

(I may continue on this later)

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